Think about it: of all the aliens you've ever seen—whether it's the wrinkled, glowing finger in *E.T.*, the toothpick-like bone that's always drooling in *Alien*, or even those gray-skinned, big-headed creatures from Area 51—does any of them wear clothes? No. Not even underwear. This phenomenon has severely damaged the confidence of Earth's fashion industry. Those Dolce & Gabbana, Vivienne...